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He Loves Me Not

Chapter One

It was my first day of college at the University of Nevada, Reno, the beginning of a new chapter in my life. Excited to see what lay in store for me and eager to begin my future, I walked down the crowded hall, looking for my classroom. At twenty years of age I was older than the average freshman, but that was okay. I felt just as young and inexperienced as any eighteen year old.

I avoided eye contact with the other students, not liking to draw attention to myself. Out of habit, I reached up to adjust my glasses, but then remembered I had traded them in for contact lenses. I hurried down the hall, worried I would be late for my first class. It was hard enough to be alone in a new city; when I added my lack of familiarity with the campus and my poor sense of direction, the butterflies in my stomach became oversized moths.

Students sat on the floor, waiting for their classroom doors to open so they could flood in. Everyone seemed to know each other, which seemed to emphasize the fact that I didn't know a soul. I pushed down the sudden feeling of panic and continued walking, reminding myself that even though I had just come through a very difficult time in my life, a new phase was about to begin. I straightened my back against the weight of my bulky backpack and withdrew a printout of my schedule from the front pocket of my jeans so I could double-check the room number I needed to find.

I slowed my pace as I scanned my schedule. My long black hair fell into my face and for the hundredth time I thought about chopping it all off. Just as I began tucking my hair behind my ear, I saw a backpack lying in my path. Though I tried to avoid it, the strap seemed to wrap itself around my foot and I felt myself falling. Trying to catch myself, I flung my arms out and slammed into the back of another student.

"Whoa!" The man said as he turned around. He caught me just before I crashed to the floor.

Blood rushed to my face and I thought I would die of embarrassment. Forcing my eyes to meet his, I said, "I am so sorry. I guess I should watch where I'm going." I realized he was still holding on to my arm, not that I minded, but I couldn't help glancing at his hand.

He quickly let go and asked, "Are you okay?"

When I nodded he asked, "Where were you going in such a hurry anyway?"

"I really wasn't going that fast. I just, well, I was looking at my schedule . . . I wasn't sure where my class was and I guess . . . I . ." My voice trailed off as I decided to stop talking before I made myself look like more of an idiot.

"That's okay. Don't worry about it."

Relieved at his response, I smiled. He gazed at me and I felt myself blush.

He cleared his throat and reached for the schedule I still held in my hand. "Maybe I can help you find your class."

I let him take the piece of paper and watched him peruse my schedule, trying not to be distracted by his startling blue eyes or his blonde hair.

"Well, what do you know?" He said, catching me staring. "We have a class together."

"We do?" I reached for the schedule, self-conscious that he knew I had been checking him out. "Which one?"

"Sociology. At eleven."

"That's cool," I said.

"What's your name?"

"Oh. It's Lily."

"Lily, huh?" He grinned again. "I'm Trevor."

"Hi," I said stupidly. It had been so long since I'd been in this kind of social situation, I felt awkward and didn't know the right thing to say. "I'm still not sure where my next class is," I finally said. "Can you point me in the right direction?"

To my pleasure and dismay, he leaned close to me to looked at the schedule I held in my hand. I noticed the subtle scent of his aftershave and felt my face nearly flush again. Well, I have to breathe, I thought. I didn't ask him to stand so close to me.

He stepped back slightly and I was mortified to realize I had almost leaned toward him to get one more sniff of his cologne.
"It looks like you're almost there," he said.

I swallowed and tried to regain my composure. "Okay," I said.

"Just go to the end of the hall and make a right." He pointed in the direction I'd been heading. "Your class should be right around there." He smiled at me. "Hey. I'll save you a seat in our class."

"That sounds great." Pleased to have some help and by such an attractive man, I smiled again. "Bye." I started in the direction Trevor had shown me and had to force myself not to turn around and see if he was watching me.

I had a hard time paying attention to the professor in my Financial Accounting class. My mind kept drifting back to Trevor and how much I had enjoyed our brief contact. Even though I'd dated a few boys in high school, I hadn't done any dating recently and knew the few flirting skills I had possessed had become rusty. In my mind I visualized the things I would say to Trevor when I saw him later that morning. Imaging myself as a character in the romance novels I liked to read, I pictured myself saying something witty, which would of course charm Trevor and he would fall for me instantly and completely.

Fifty minutes later it was time for my next class, but not yet time to see Trevor in Sociology. I put my notebook into my backpack and looked at my schedule to see where my next class would be. I'd had a map of the campus, but couldn't find it and realized I must have left it on my desk back in my apartment.

"Crap," I muttered under my breath as I rooted around the bottom of my backpack once more in the hopes my map would be there.

"Is everything okay?" the girl sitting next to me asked.

Startled to realize someone had heard me, I stopped digging in my backpack. "I was just looking for my campus map, but I'm not finding it. Maybe you can you tell me where this building is?"

She looked at where I pointed on my schedule, then she unzipped a side pocket on her backpack and pulled out a campus map. She spread it out on the table and showed me where we were and where I needed to go.

"Thanks," I said.

"You can keep the map," she said as she folded it up and handed it to me. "I know my way around well enough that I don't really need it."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive."

I took it from her. "By the way, I'm Lily."

"Alyssa," she said.

I tucked the map into my backpack. "I appreciate your help."

"No problem." She smiled. "And don't worry. By the end of the week you'll know you're way around really well."

We both stood and walked out the classroom door.

"I'll see you later," Alyssa said before walking away.

As my next class came to a close, I thought about Trevor. I remembered my romantic fantasies about him falling madly in love with me and felt foolish. What makes me think he's interested in me that way? He was just trying to be helpful.

Eight minutes later I stood at the entrance to the classroom where we both had the Sociology class. I didn't see him anywhere and wondered if I should wait for him to come so we could sit together. After a couple of minutes I wondered if he would even be coming. My heart sinking, I admitted that he had just been being kind after all when he promised he would save me a seat. He might not even have the class with me, I reflected. He was probably trying to make me feel better about nearly knocking him over.

Picking up my heavy backpack from the floor, I slung it over my shoulders and walked into the classroom.